


From Unwilling Pawn to Reluctant Queen

by Small_Hobbit



Category: Historical RPF
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-04
Updated: 2016-07-04
Packaged: 2018-07-21 13:55:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 678
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7389646
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Small_Hobbit/pseuds/Small_Hobbit
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Anne's thoughts at various moments in her life.</p>
            </blockquote>





	From Unwilling Pawn to Reluctant Queen

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Selden](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Selden/gifts).



> My thanks to my beta.

Flaming men!  My sole role in life, to keep my father in the custom to which he has grown accustomed, namely most powerful man in the kingdom.  And he is, although Margaret of Anjou is not someone to be trifled with.  If he fails to keep her sweet he may find he loses his head.  And I, what will become of me?  “One day you will be Queen of England.”  Will I?  Do I even want to be?

My husband is consumed by the need to fight and kill.  He and his mother will stop at nothing to keep the King on his throne.  And poor Henry is so unaware of the acts which are being committed in his name.  If Edward grows strong enough I wonder if Henry may find his life unexpectedly shortened; a tragic illness perhaps.  And then what of me?  When a more suitable dynastic spouse is needed, an unfortunate accident would be easy to engineer.

***

Beastly men!  Dragged from France to Tewkesbury as a mere chattel, then taken prisoner.  I do not mourn Edward’s death, nor am I surprised at it. His confidence in himself was always greater than his ability.  And now my brother-in-law, George, Duke of Clarence, continues to treat me in the same way.  All he can see is the wealth of my family estates, and how they can be of benefit to him.  He is not content with the half my sister Isabel brings to him, but he must prevent me marrying again, so he can have it all. 

But I have learnt my lesson well.  Being beholden to Margaret of Anjou has taught me when to be seen and when to stay in the shadows.  And it has shown me ways to contact others in secret and how to judge who to trust and who would betray that trust at the first clink of coins.  And in England it is much easier to reach out to friends than it was in France.  George shall not know of my correspondence with Richard of York.

***

Beloved men!  Is it possible I shall after all be happy in this life?  I am married to the man I have loved since childhood and I have a son of my own.  Richard is Governor of the North, a role which merits his abilities, and we live in my beloved Middleham Castle.  I can scarcely believe that something I hardly dared even dream about as a girl has come true.  If we can grow old together, surrounded by a loving family, there is no more I could hope for.

***

Wretched men!  Edward’s death has robbed me of my chance of happiness.  There are those who believe he might have been poisoned, but it is no surprise that one who for so long indulged in the pleasures of the flesh should find his body revolt and let him down. 

And now our very lives are threatened.  Richard is named Protector, but the Queen is powerful and her sons will do as she says.  He must act and act decisively; there is no room for failure at this stage.  The boys will be safe in the Tower, until such time as they can be sent abroad.

But for now it seems more blood must be spilled, as if we had not all seen far too much of that in past years.

***

Miserable woman!  My son is dead.  Richard and I mourned his loss, all the more painful as we were not with him at his death.  It was so sudden and far too soon.  And yet I dare not cry.  For if I do, I know my own breathing will be laboured and I would not have Richard see me suffer. 

There are nights when I find it hard to fall asleep and Richard will hold me close until I do.  There have been times when I have woken again to find his tears falling on me.  I say nothing and remain still, for I would treasure this expression of his love while I still can.

 

 


End file.
